Terrifying Thoughts
Don’t get me wrong, I am happy. I write about you less and less. Most days, I just let the words sit with me for minutes, sometimes hours, as I drive through the streets still stained with your name. I think about you and then I forget. With enough distractions, enough someone elses, months later, what once was an open wound is now just a bruise. The kind you forget is there but still hurts when you touch it. They didn’t lie, time heals after all. So maybe the worst is over. Even if some nights, I still catch myself awake past midnight wondering where’s that one piece of me that went missing and never came back. But still, don’t get me wrong, I am happy. Even if happy doesn’t mean whole and definitely doesn’t mean complete. Maybe all of this is just my way of saying I miss you. And what a terrifying thought it is to still miss you after a year or two or five or ten. What a terrifying thought it is to keep moving forward without ever finding the strength to move on from...